February 5, 2013 § 5 Comments
- You can’t take back the shit you don’t remember saying. And there’s a strong possibility it was some pretty messed up shit.
- It’s really hard to not fall down in 4 inch heels.
- I am officially “too old for this shit”.
- If you puke in the cab, that cabbie will come after you.
- There’s a chance you might die. (This is something I make sure to remind myself before I leave the house.)
- It’s a waste of time to worry about what other people think of you.
- Making friends with total strangers isn’t always a bad thing but sometimes, its a very bad thing.
- Last night’s impromptu dance party, is next week’s ‘lying about how I got this black eye’.
- 90% of my time is spent suppressing my crazy, 3% is spent humiliating myself and 7% is spent formulating a strategy for redemption.*
- I am ‘that girl’.
I Make Little To No Effort To Take Care Of Myself:
*Not accounted for is approximately .025% spent picking up my credit card from the bar the next day.