How To Be a Writer
May 15, 2014 § 3 Comments
- Drink a lot. Drink till you strong-arm strangers into letting you give them piggy back rides and then you fall down and skin your knee and now your jeans have a hole in them.
- Be existential to the point where it stifles your ability to have a conversation that doesn’t loop back to space and / or death.
- Watch people interact and make up backstories about their lives, previous lives and any future lives.
- Be an above average failer. Fail and fail again. And every time you fall off course, reassure yourself by convincing yourself ‘this is your path.’ Because it is.
- Be super broke all the time. Money is for people who want to buy things.
- Over-analyze everything. Cause who needs sleep?
- Really care about what others think of you, even people you’ve never met.
- Be in touch with your emotions. I like to do my crying during my daily commute to and from work. Thank god for LA traffic or I’d never find the time.
- Read. Seriously. If books ever die I’ll be sad forever.
- Be around whatever / whoever makes your heart go boom.
- Don’t edit. People are always more than happy to point out your grammar mistakes. It would be cruel to take that away from them.
- Think about shit. Like why hasn’t anyone update the keyhole? It seems like a pretty easy thing to do yet it’s been completely overlooked. Remember in Back to the Future II when she just scanned her thumb print? This world needs updated keyholes, less guns and, like, at least 10 times more shaved ice shops.
- Resolve to live in gratitude rather than regret. Don’t fall victim to the past or be a slave to the future. Now, is where it’s at.
- Fuel the fuck up. 5-hour energy. Coffee SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS. I like to be cracked out to the point of WebMDing chest pains. (That’s for script writing. For blog stuff I prefer wine till I’m red in the teeth and crying at Youtube videos.)
- Own your uniqueness. There’s a fine line between masturbating about yourself and completely turning your back on that magical sparkle that makes you you. Find that special place, nestle in and pay rent until you can afford a down payment on the mortgage there.
- Draw strength from your spirit animal. Be it a lion, a shark or a butterfly.
- Live life like it’s a god damn fairy tale. Even when it’s not. Even when it’s super shit. Because even when it’s super shit you’re still not dead. And that’s something right?
- And lastly – write. It’s been said before but it’s worth repeating, you can’t be a writer if you’re not writing. You can’t even call yourself a writer if you’re not writing. Those are the rules. I didn’t make them, I just try to abide by them. And I advise you to do the same, my fellow writers, write the shit out of whatever the fuck you’re writing. I support you.
Ok, I think were done here. But also, I recommend you print this, fold it pamphlet style and keep it somewhere handy. Love you like a love song.
Oh one more thing, I liked this – Abandoned places around the world.
But This Wind Machine Is Just a Fan?