2013, Pinky Swear You’ll Be Good To Me

December 31, 2012 § Leave a comment

Its that time of the year to pop, fizz, clink and kiss 2012 good-bye.

Have a brilliant New Years, you bastards! See you in 2013, xo

I Want To Kiss Your Face, But Only At Midnight:

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Save Water Drink Champagne

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Make Way For the New

Cheers, Bitches!

December 24, 2012 § 2 Comments

Happy holidays, my loves! I hope yours is truly mind-blowing! xoxo

The Best Way To Spread Holiday Cheer Is Singing Loud For All To Hear:

Mean Girls Christmas


Love That Powder

December 21, 2012 § 1 Comment

I’m calling an official Snow Day!  So don’t bother going into work and/or school.

I’ll be heading up to the mountains for a long overdue snowboarding session. Hope to see you there. But if not, I hope you have a lovely weekend whatever you do! xoxo

Ah Ski Ski, God Damn:

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Lost in the Snow

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Couple Kissing in the snow

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Deep Sh*t…Only Not Really

December 20, 2012 § 1 Comment

Smash Cut To: The World Is Ending

You see, times like this make me regret every ‘good’ decision I’ve ever made. If the world ends tomorrow I will be really upset that I didn’t do at least ten times more f*cked up shit than what I’ve done.

And also, sidenote – what does one wear to the end of the world? Something practical like hiking boots, a pocket knife and rain jacket? Or something elegant, like a captain going down with his ship?

If this is another false alarm I’ll be pissed I wasted an entire post on it.

I should really go do something…

When you think about it, it’s all Taylor Swift’s fault.

My Whole Life Up to This Point Has Been a Complete Lie:

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Good Job, Me!

December 19, 2012 § 1 Comment

I believe whole-heartedly (exclusively) in positive reinforcement but I think I may have gone a little overboard. I realized that I seem to be patting myself on the back for just about anything…

Jamie’s List of Things I’m Proud of But Really Shouldn’t Be

  • Washing my face before bed
  • Being on time for work
  • Not getting murdered
  • Remembering to pack my gym bag even when I don’t make it to the gym
  • Not giving a shit
  • Falling asleep before 1AM
  • Not hating myself in the morning – Progress!
  • Drinking water (and not even close to the amount I should be drinking, just any amount of water)
  • Not having that second Red Bull
  • Drying my hair before leaving the house
  • Not burning my toast
  • Being able to update my facebook status and do my make-up all while driving to work
  • Not saying something stupid and/or offensive during a social event*
  • Finishing an entire season of a show in one sitting
  • Buying groceries
  • Jumping on the bandwagon to read every popular book series, even when I absolutely hate it one sentence in

Shades Of Gray:

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B&W Clouds

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Elvis and Marilyn Monroe

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*Has not happened.

F*ck This, I’ll Be a Stripper

December 18, 2012 § 1 Comment

My New Year’s resolution this year (and every year) is to get a hot bod. And I swear to god this year its actually going to happen.

When I’m trying to save calories I typically replace wine with a roofie over some splenda, ice and diet tonic water.

I also, try to workout. Which is why I decided to take my first pole dancing class. Initially I had my reservations. It seemed like it would just be a lot of rolling around on the ground getting bruises on my hips. But it turns out its actually super-fun swinging around that pole. So this year I’m adding on a few more items to my New Year’s Resolution list:

  • Become an expert at pole dancing
  • Make a friend who has a stripper pole

You Never Know When It Could Save Your Life:

Pole Dancer Splits

Spiderman Kiss

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Pole Dancer

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Audrey Hepburn

Jamie’s Workout Mix

Step Away From The Gift Card

December 17, 2012 § 1 Comment

Buying gifts is hard work. But not to worry my loves, I’m here to help!

If Anyone Gives Me Food as a Gift, I’ll Be Pissed:

Heart Clips Ban.doI Heart These Clips

ASOS Cat HeadbandThis Cat Eared Headband is Too Precious!

heroincocaine_mediumHeroin & Cocaine Shakers

Best Friend Iphone CasesBFF Iphone Cases

Graffiti Martini ShakerGraffiti Spray Can Martini Shaker

Go To The Gym Pillow

Druzy Ring

I Need This Reminder Pillow

brass mirrorBrass Mirror

SIN The Gluttony Collection Porcelain Sugar ConePorcelain Sugar Cone Cups

Double Trouble HeadwrapDouble Trouble Head Wrap

Izola Flask Flask – Always a Good Idea

Couch Arm WrapCouch Arm Wrap

Anchors Aweigh Ship Wheel Tea InfuserAnchors Aweigh Tea Infuser

Why Waste These?

December 14, 2012 § 1 Comment

Whenever I get a random idea for something to write about I usually jot down a quick note in my phone. Sometimes when I go back to look at these I realize they are useless, either because they are really stupid or because I have no idea what I was talking about. Rather than letting these random thoughts go to waste, I thought I’d share a few.

Random Thoughts by Jamie

  • Can you get a cheaper haircut?
  • My alter ego thinks your stupid
  • Best case scenario – he’s still a wizard
  • Killer whale ebonics
  • Girl handing out meat samples in food court gets attacked by birds (or squirrels or a seeing eye dog)
  • Harvard Law – Just kidding
  • Skinny girls have huge bushes
  • Tupac’s hologram gets shot
  • A sexually transmitted disease where you die – not slowly, but instantly
  • Is it just me or does Dane Cook seem like a real dick?
  • Tom Young Soup and Spicy wrap – wait no…that was a lunch order
  • A pink bitch who can’t get potty trained
  • Leftover Chinese food is like porn, once your finished its just gross
  • Over Eaters Anonymous who lunch together
  • Really bad poetry
  • It would be like not f*cking James Dean – if he was alive, and not gay and also, not old
  • Kind of like Kick Ass but with Mario & Luigi – only they are both really hot
  • Fat kid snack – mac n’ cheese inside a tater tot
  • Life Lesson 89: Not everyone is impressed with a backbend
  • Blackout is such an ugly word, I prefer – highly developed coping mechanism
  • He’s the human version of food poisoning – only with less vomiting and more diarrhea, cha cha cha
  • Glitter contacts
  • You win some, you dim sum

I have actually a LOT more of these but I guess I’ll save those for another random thought Friday. And now some random pictures. Enjoy!

ETC:

Fuck You I'm a Shark

Photo Booth

Husky in a Backpack

Pink Pool

Bear in Baby pose

Dope Swimsuit

Tacos

Michael Cera

Superhero Dog

Something Strange Happened Here

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Where Am I?

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